Superman as a Dad

As you can tell by the date, Today is Halloween; but even more than that, today is my Dad's 50th birthday! For being such the incredible dad that he is, I thought I would write a tribute to him.

If you know dad, you know he has a tough outer layer, which can be difficult to pierce. Being his only daughter, though, I like to think that I have a special ability to break through his macho-man exterior and get to know his most vulnerable self.

Growing up, dad always told us kids ("us" being my brother, cousins, and I) that he was Superman. He was so believable at being Superman that my cousin, Shawna, actually went to school and told her class about her uncle's supernatural identity lol. He was strong and knew everything there was to know and made me feel safe from the scary things that loom in the darkness, as he tucked me into bed every night.

Dad gave me lots of reasons to brag about him, but I remember one time in particular that I went to school and told my friends I have "the best dad in the world". It was pet day at school, and I was bringing my Jackson Chameleon to show my class. On our way out the door, my dad noticed there were sugar ants all in my chameleon's cage. Instead of making me leave my prized pet at home, even though he had work and we were already running late, he took the cage outside and cleaned it all out so I could take it to school. This probably doesn't seem like a big deal to most people, but it was one of the many times I actually stopped to think about how lucky I was to have such a great dad and I will never forget that day. Though I've always loved my dad exactly the same, I didn't always take the time to truly appreciate him.

As a teenager, I didn't always get along with my dad. in fact, I pretty much fought with him constantly. I thought he was unemotional, insensitive towards my feelings, and most of all, I hated that he didn't spend as much time with me as he did my brother. I wanted to go on hunting outings, fishing trips, and learn how to golf! So how did I express my frustrations with him? I yelled and disrespected him and fought him over everything I could. As you can imagine, this didn't exactly make my dad want to be around me any more. This is how our relationship continued basically until I went to college, where I grew up some and started to grasp the fact that my dad isn't actually Superman; he's just a man, and I'm lucky enough to have a dad who tries to be Superman for my brother and I.

Looking back, I regret my teenage years with everything in me. I wish I understood then what I do now- that he didn't ever care about me any less, he just didn't really know how to relate to me or speak to me in my specific love language. I went from a little girl who went along with everything he said, to a confused teen who took it far too personally whenever he spent his time doing something else, rather than spending it with me. I now know that his love language is service. In his eyes, he was probably doing everything humanly possible to keep his daughter content; he worked and gave me spending money, he mowed the lawn, did house work, etc. and I just remained unsatisfied with his efforts.

Now, I am happy to say that we're far past that point in time. We now share an alma mater, which I like to think makes us closer and gives us something in common, he taught Michael and I how to swing dance for the first dance at our wedding, performed our ceremony, and spent the time and money to move us into our new apartment in Iowa. He's supportive in every way imaginable. Dad, I'm so lucky to have you! Happy Birthday, old man, I love you!!

A New Beginning

Well, married life isn't exactly as I'd envisioned it, but it's wonderful so many reasons. Since I know i won't always remember the overwhelming combination of emotions that I now feel as a newlywed, I thought I'd record them through this blog. Happy reading :)

By the time I moved up here to Des Moines, Michael had already been here a month for school. I missed him and our sweet Gizmo so much, and even though everyone told me to come into marriage without expectations of Michael as my husband, it was hard not to; I just couldn't wait to live with Michael by ourselves for the first time! I thought we would have the perfect leave-it-to-beaver household...ha!

The first couple of weeks were by far the most difficult, as we established our new roles in the household and eliminated the pre-conceived expectations we had for eachother. I knew Michael would be studying alot, but I guess I didn't realize how much. Here I was, in this new apartment in a state I'd never even been to, with a new job, no friends or family, and I literally only got to see Michael about 30 mins a day, which was usually for dinner. He didn't even come to bed until hours after I'd fallen to sleep. "Is this how it's going to be for the next 4 years?!" I wondered. I felt lost and alone and so homesick. I didn't really feel like I had a purpose here. I gave up OT school and the life I was comfortable in, to support Michael while he's in school, and I didn't even get to see him! I was a little resentful of his super limited schedule and he was frustrated that I wasn't happy because there really wasn't much he could do about it.

It took a little bit of patience and understanding on both our parts, but after we learned how to communicate well, I learned about Michael's needs in a wife and he learned how to comfort and support me. Since then, life has only improved for us. We've grown so much stronger as a couple, I began to really enjoy my job, the boxes were s-l-o-w-l-y getting unpacked, and the beautiful new furniture that my parents bought us for a wedding present even arrived, making us feel more at home. Though we still have basically no time together, and I can count the number of things we've been able to do together on one hand, it does make us value the moments we do have together even more.

One Saturday, Michael had a few hours he could spend away from his studies and we decided to explore Iowa together by going to a local apple orchard. It was a really fun experience, getting to pick the apples right off the tree and eat them. Definitely wasn't something we are able to do in TX! Here are a few pics from our evening...

The next chance we had to spend time together was for my birthday. Michael had told me that he had a surprise for me, but I wasn't sure if the surprise was the date or a gift, so I didn't have a clue about what it could be. When I got home from work, I stepped out of my car and noticed Michael sitting in his car, parked next to me. I saw some of my sweats in the backseat, and instead of the obvious, I thought to myself "has it really been so long since the last time I did laundry that he's taking it to a laundromat?!" Then I noticed Gizmo jumping around in the front seat and Michael signaled me to get into the car. I was thrilled when we arrived at a camping ground, after about a 30 min. drive! Michael had bought us a new tent and everything we would need for camping. He even brought dinner, which consisted of hotsogs, brautwurst, chips, pickles, and s'mores for dessert. He even brought his laptop to watch a DVD, and beef jerky and jiffypop to cook over the fire for a snack. Although we were exhausted and ended up falling asleep around 11pm, and we had to get up at 7am so Michael could resume his studying, we still had such a perfect evening together while it lasted. It was the perfect birthday surprise!

The weekend after my birthday, my dad flew me back to the great state of Texas for my cousin, Lindsay's, wedding. Although Michael wasn't able to come because of his heavy school load, I still had a blast! Not only did Lindsay and Sam have a beautiful wedding, but I also got to go fishing with mom and dad at the beach,  celebrate my belated birthday with all of my family, and spent precious time with my cousins. The older I get, the more I treasure time with my family and the more I realize what a uniquely close family I have, being so large. I feel so incredibly lucky to be blessed with such a strong support system that I can always turn to. Here are some pics from the time I spent there...

Though I SO loved my time in TX, it was nice to come home to my sweet hubby. He even tidied up the apartment for my return lol :) Last weekend, Michael and I finally got to go to the Aggie football game against Iowa State. I've been looking forward to it since Michael gave me the tickets as a present, on our wedding day. Lately, though, he's been so busy with studying that we didn't think we were going to have time to go. He actually ended up pulling some all-nighters to make time for the game. We had such a great time at the game and the Aggies killed the Cyclones. Whoop!

Well, that basically sums up our life in Iowa, so far. I know it's pretty uneventful, but hey, there's not a whole lot of fun things to do by myself. I've been trying new recipes from Pinterest, which have been great. I'll be sure to post them when I make a new one. I've also had alot of requests for pics of the apartment. It's pretty slow-going because everything I've done to it is DIY, to save money. I'll post pics as I make progress!